Monster Crushers
by lesbianpapyrus
Summary: (Underswap AU) Happstablook teases Undyne about her crush, only for it to come right back around to bite him.


"Y-You totally like her."

"Shut up, ya little pink punk. I do not!"

"You do!" cried Happstablook triumphantly. "I've seen the way you get around her. All b-blushing and tongue-tied… it's s-so obvious. You _love_ Alphys!"

Undyne nearly snapped her pliers in half. "Say one more word, and I'll turn this body into scrap metal and it'll never see the light of day," she threatened.

But Happstablook knew she wasn't being serious; their friendship was too strong for Undyne to ever consider hurting him that way.

Undyne's blush faded away as she focused on a particularly difficult section of wiring for Happstablook's new robotic body she was building.

Happstablook slowly floated toward her until he was right next to her ear. "U-Undyne! Alphys is coming and she needs your help!"

"What?! Where?! _What?!"_ The pliers went flying as Undyne jumped up in a panic. Then she narrowed her eyes as she realized the lab was empty except for her and Happstablook. "Happs! You son of a—you're lucky you're incorporeal or I'd turn your little ghost ass into mincemeat!"

Happstablook flew back out of Undyne's reach, giggling wildly. "I knew it!" Then they settled down a bit. "Y-You know, you should really ask her out. She might like you back. In fact, I think she does. I could ask her for you."

"Oh, _hell_ no." Undyne retrieved her pliers and went back to work. "Don't even _think_ about it, or I _will_ scrap this body."

Happstablook sighed and descended until he was floating right above the table where she was working. "Okay, fine."

Just then, the doors to the lab opened, and a tall, lanky skeleton wearing a wrinkled orange sweatshirt trudged in.

Undyne did not miss the gray blush that was slowly creeping up on Happstablook's face.

But for now, she ignored it. "Hey, Papyrus. Did ya need something? I'm trying to build Happs' body right now, but as soon as I'm finished with this bit of wiring, I can help."

"Nah, it's fine. I just wondered if you wanted a smoke or something." Papyrus held out a package of weed.

"Nah, I'm good."

"Okay. Guess I should head back to Snowdin before Sans comes chasing after me," he said almost boredly. Then he noticed the little ghost hovering nearby, and a small smile lit up his face. "Oh, hey, Happs. How's it going?"

Happstablook's blush grew deeper, and they could only avoid the skeleton's gaze and wave a little before phasing back through the wall in a panic.

He could hear Papyrus's chuckle through the wall. "Alright, guess I'll see you around, Undyne. I really _fish_ I could stay longer."

"I literally hate you."

"Oh, come on, you're smiling."

"That was the most awful pun I've ever heard, and if you ever say it again, you're gonna find yourself missing a few phalanges."

"Okay, fair enough. See you later."

"Get outta here, lazybones."

Happstablook waited a few minutes until he was sure Papyrus had gone, then he phased back out into the main lab area.

" _So."_

Happstablook froze, knowing exactly what was coming.

" _You_ are going to tease me about liking _Alphys—"_

"Undyne—"

"—when you like _him?!"_

"U-Undyne—"

But the fish monster was already laughing raucously. "I can't believe this! You like _Papyrus!_ Fuhuhuhuhuhuhu—you wanna tease me about Alphys, at least she's a badass warrior! All Papyrus ever does is slack off work, smoke weed, and sleep standing up!" Undyne's laughter stopped abruptly. "Actually, that last thing _is_ kind of impressive…"

"You don't understand!" Happstablook cried indignantly. "Papyrus is really very sweet… he's always nice to me, he doesn't ever smoke around me because he knows it messes with my magic… and he's always around when I'm lonely." The ghost's face broke into a wistful smile. "He's really trying his best. Being underground for so long is really just taking its toll on him. He's really trying."

"Aren't we all." Undyne leaned against the worktable. "I know what you're talking about already, Happs. Paps is practically my best friend other than your cousin and Alphys. And while I still think it's kind of funny, I also think it's kind of nice. I think you guys would be good for each other."

"Really?" whispered Happstablook.

Undyne smiled wickedly. "Yeah. We should arrange a double date. You get Alphys, I'll call Papyrus back right now and we can set it up."

"Nooooooooo! _Undyne!"_ screeched the ghost in a panic.

"I'm kidding, I'm kidding!" laughed Undyne. "God, I'd probably end up backing out at the last minute, anyway. I'm not good at dating."

"Well, I think you and Alphys are good for each other, too. Even if _you_ don't think you're good enough."

"Thanks, dude." Undyne's voice grew quiet. "Right back atcha. I really hope we both get what we want someday." She picked up her pliers one last time. "Now shut up so I can finish your body."

 **oooooooooo**

another request from my Tumblr!

this time it's Underswap, and you get a peek into Happstablook and Undyne's relationship!

enjoy!


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